The above is from the prayer of general thanksgiving in the 1662 Book of Common Prayer. This delightful prayer concludes with a request, as the prayer asks God for the ability and strength to serve Him and walk in His ways.
In the last few months, Jessica and I have been thinking much about the service of God. I think we would have said that we are currently in the service of God, but in a way that has required relatively little from us. We are in the service of God, but the extent that we have given ourselves up in this service would be up for legitimate discussion. Enter now the opportunity in England. This indeed, if it all falls into place, would definitively slot us both into that considerably uncomfortable place of being wholly within the service of God.
Uncomfortable because it relies so little on me. I have to sit back, trust, have faith, and wait. I normally only like doing each of those things if I am retaining a notable corner on the market of control. Yet indeed, every weekday I pray that I may give myself up. Perhaps this release of control was what I was praying for all along. Perhaps each day I was being prepared to be able to look ahead into the unknown and to be at peace. God has certainly felt more real to me these past few months than he has in a long time, as I have been consistently confronted with how outside of my own influence, control, and power this whole situation is.
And it continues. As the date for our pitch to our church has come and gone, I feel no more in control now than I did two days ago. I continue in his service: fully given up.
If you are interested in more practical details of where we are at right now, feel free to head over here.